whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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