no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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