distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
