Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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