omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
