Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Life is so much better after having sex.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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