Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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