I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
