Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
