have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
