hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
