Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
