My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
