my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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