just survived the first fart of the relationship.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Dicks are not precious.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
