Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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