I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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