My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
What a dumb baby whore.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
