just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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