I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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