Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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