Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
