matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
