Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
