Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I think your dad took our porno
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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