If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
