If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
We are all done wearing pants today
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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