brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
