We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
