I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
