no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
