I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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