quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
