erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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