You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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