What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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