Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
either way he was missing a nipple.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
