the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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