a queef is a wish your heart makes.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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