I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
two words...techno handjob
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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