In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
