i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
