She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
