idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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