shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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