if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
