Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
