I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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