If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
