Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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